You know, moving on is never easy. In fact, it could be the most horrible step you have to take in your life. Do you remember the scene when Edward left Bella, and she cried all night with pain in her chest? That was the exact scenario of myself crying all night long and begging God to kill me because I couldn't hold on any longer to the pain. I don't know what physics or chemistry that connects the emotional pain and the physical pain, because it really hurts in the center of my chest. It feels like someone is drilling my chest and there's 50 kg sack of rice placed in it, I can't breathe. This is how hard to move on. Just so I give you the idea or a picture how it feels like.
I've tried to move on several times from the same person, but I always fail. I always end up crawling back to him. I've learned that it is because I just put an end to a chapter. But the last breakup, I didn't just put an end to a chapter, but I closed the book. And I didn't return the book in my shelf (because I know I have the tendency to get it again), but I gave it to my Creator. I told Him, "this is the story of my past, this book is now Yours. Use it in every way for Your glory."
